So anyone who knows me knows that as lame as it may be, I'm not much one for movies. Don't get me wrong, I appreciate the art and all and realize I'm probably missing out on a ton of cool shit I just have a horrible tendency to fall asleep almost every time I try to watch one. Before my I had my daughter, I probably hadn't been to the theatre in 3 or so years and even with her we've only seen Shrek & Rapunzel.
I did however stumble across a film I can't wait to see (and stay awake in!). The film is called The Other F-Word and debuted at this years SXSW, its set to release this fall. It's a rock-u-mentary (sorry couldn't resist! [also for those who know me, know I have an insatiable thirst for puns]) about punk rockers turned fathers, and balancing those two very different worlds. It was inspired by the book Punk Rock Dad by Jim Lindburg of Pennywise and while I’ve never been a huge fan if his it’s a super cute & quick read. The main premise of it is how does one go from saying “fuck authority” to being the authority when they become a parent.
Why am I so excited about this film? Well, it seems it's pretty much made for me. While Little Sass has become the number one passion in my life, for many years before her punk rock was my main passion. It's just one of those things I stumbled upon around age 12 and haven't been able to shake ever since. Most of my friends have outgrown it, or it least don't obsess over things like Alkaline Trio re-recording old tunes for a 15th anniversary release. Most don't even bother going to shows anymore or get excited about seeing NOFX for the 20th time or the fact that they've seen them in 4 different states. Most of them don't get giddy when they get mentioned by a favorite rock idol on twitter, hell, I think any of them even have a twitter account (btw El Hefe totally digs my Ben Weasel jokes!). I however love this stuff.
I know it's odd and probably says something about me that I'm the only one who still cares about this shit. I don't really care what those other people think cause it makes me happy and the internet makes it so easy to keep up with. I love that can look forward to a film about 2 of my favorite things; being a parent and punk rock music. I'm not saying that I have anything in common with those featured in this film, I've never been in a band and can't even play an instrument, but I can definitely relate to needing to find new grounding and where you belong once a child comes into your life.
For me the first year of motherhood was a total Zoolander "Who am I?" moment. I no longer really fit in with my friends I shared common interests with because no one else had kids. I no longer was going to Casey Moore's twice a week or even staying up past 10 o clock (which I was & still am completely fine with). I found myself trying to forge friendships with other mothers I had nothing in common with except for the fact that we both pushed out kids out of our crotches. Not that there was anything wrong with these other moms, it's just I could never really be myself around them and everything just felt so forced. I guess I was just trying to do what I felt a parent was "supposed" to be. Luckily, I eventually found myself again and realized I was sick of trying to be something I wasn't. I realized that I am supposed to be Little Sass' mom but I'm also still supposed to be me. I think a confident and happy mom will raise a confident and happy daughter.
I did however stumble across a film I can't wait to see (and stay awake in!). The film is called The Other F-Word and debuted at this years SXSW, its set to release this fall. It's a rock-u-mentary (sorry couldn't resist! [also for those who know me, know I have an insatiable thirst for puns]) about punk rockers turned fathers, and balancing those two very different worlds. It was inspired by the book Punk Rock Dad by Jim Lindburg of Pennywise and while I’ve never been a huge fan if his it’s a super cute & quick read. The main premise of it is how does one go from saying “fuck authority” to being the authority when they become a parent.
Why am I so excited about this film? Well, it seems it's pretty much made for me. While Little Sass has become the number one passion in my life, for many years before her punk rock was my main passion. It's just one of those things I stumbled upon around age 12 and haven't been able to shake ever since. Most of my friends have outgrown it, or it least don't obsess over things like Alkaline Trio re-recording old tunes for a 15th anniversary release. Most don't even bother going to shows anymore or get excited about seeing NOFX for the 20th time or the fact that they've seen them in 4 different states. Most of them don't get giddy when they get mentioned by a favorite rock idol on twitter, hell, I think any of them even have a twitter account (btw El Hefe totally digs my Ben Weasel jokes!). I however love this stuff.
I know it's odd and probably says something about me that I'm the only one who still cares about this shit. I don't really care what those other people think cause it makes me happy and the internet makes it so easy to keep up with. I love that can look forward to a film about 2 of my favorite things; being a parent and punk rock music. I'm not saying that I have anything in common with those featured in this film, I've never been in a band and can't even play an instrument, but I can definitely relate to needing to find new grounding and where you belong once a child comes into your life.
For me the first year of motherhood was a total Zoolander "Who am I?" moment. I no longer really fit in with my friends I shared common interests with because no one else had kids. I no longer was going to Casey Moore's twice a week or even staying up past 10 o clock (which I was & still am completely fine with). I found myself trying to forge friendships with other mothers I had nothing in common with except for the fact that we both pushed out kids out of our crotches. Not that there was anything wrong with these other moms, it's just I could never really be myself around them and everything just felt so forced. I guess I was just trying to do what I felt a parent was "supposed" to be. Luckily, I eventually found myself again and realized I was sick of trying to be something I wasn't. I realized that I am supposed to be Little Sass' mom but I'm also still supposed to be me. I think a confident and happy mom will raise a confident and happy daughter.
I still often wonder how I will handle certain situations as Little Sass grows up coming from the background I do. Like when she asks about Christmas for example. "Well honey, there are a lot of people out there that believe in a magical man named Jesus who walked on water, turned water to wine, and rose from the dead. They celebrate his birthday because his mom got knocked up without even having sex by another made up magical entity named God. These people are illogical fairy tale believers and in our house we believe in science and empirical evidence". Well sure that works for me but when she repeats that to her friends and they repeat it to their parents, her playdates will likely come to a screeching halt. I don't want to do that to her but I also won't lie to her for the sake of conformity and harmonic playdates.
I intend to raise her in a truthful fashion and not lie to her to save myself a difficult conversation. I will never push my beliefs on her but will encourage her to seek out her own. I realize this sometimes may be difficult to do especially being the opinionated and overly verbose woman I am (and I will likely only get worse with age). If she wants to become a mormon, I can’t say I’d be thrilled but hey it could be worse (will tea partiers still be around in 15 years?). I guess a lot of my anxieties about me being her parent instead of some cookie cutter baby maker lady may never even prove to be problematic. Maybe I’m putting myself on some pedestal by thinking I’m any different than any other parent out there. Only time will tell I guess. At the end of the day I’m just a mom who loves and wishes the very best for her child, and who happens to like really loud and fast power chords.
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